How I Became a Christian: Out of My Diary

As soon as we graduated from our college, each of us was offered a position witli a salary of thirty dollars a month. We were taught in practical sciences, and were intended to develop the material resources of our country. We never have swerved from this aim. In Jesus of Nazareth we saw a man who was the Savior of mankind by being the son of a carpenter, and we his lowly disciples might be farmers, fishermen, engineers, manufacturers, and be at the same time preachers of the gospel of peace. Peter a fisherman and Paul a tent-maker were our examples. We never have construed Christianity as a hierarchy or ecclesiasticalism of any sort. We take it essentially as people's religion, and our being ''men of the world" are of no obstacles whatever for our being preachers and missionaries. We believe, no more consecrated set of young men e^ er left a hall of learning than we when we left our science college. Our aim was spiritual, though our training and destinations were material.

After I finished my college-course, I made another visit to my home in the metropolis, this time all the ''six brethren" coming up with me. Our stay in the city was thoroughly enjoyable. We had many invitations from missionaries, were lauded for what little we had done; were asked to speak of our experiences in their meetings. We studied the construction of churches, and the ways of managing them, to apply them in our own church when we returned to our place. Though coming from the far north, from amidst primeval forests and bears and wolves, we found we were not the least intelligent among Christians. What we heard from the flour-barrel pulpit and talked about upon the blue blankets, were not the crudest thoughts when compared with the teachings and cultures of the metropolitan churches. On some points, indeed, we thought we had profounder and healthier views than our friends who were nurtured under the care of professional theologians.

I also carried on my missionary work among my friends and relatives, as I had done two years ago. The arch-heretic was my father, who with his learning and strong convictions of his own, was the hardest to approach with my faith. For three years I had been sending him books and pamphlets, and had written him constantly, imploring him to come to Christ and receive His salvation. He was a voracious reader and my books were not entirely ignored. But nothing could move him. He w^as a righteous man as far as social morality was concerned, and as is always the case with such a man, he was not one who felt the need of salvation most. At the close of my college course, I was again awarded with a little sum of money for my study and industry, and I thought of using it in the most profitable w^ay possible. I prayed my God over it. Just then a thought occurred to me that I might take some presents to my parents; and no better articles were suggested to me for this purpose than the commentary on the Gospel of St. Mark, written by Dr. Faber, a German missionary in China.

The work was in five volumes, and as a i)roduct of sound and broad scliolarsliip in the learnings of the people for whom it was intended, it was, and still is, very highly spoken of. It was written in unpointed Chinese, and I thought the difficulty of reading it, if not anything else, might whet my father's intellectual appetite to peruse it. I invested two dollars upon this w^ork, and carried it in my trunk to my father. But alas I w^hen I gave it to my father, no w^ords of thanks or appreciation came from his lips, and all the best wishes of my heart met his coldest reception. I went into a closet and wept. The books were thrown into a box with other rubbishes; but I took out the first yolume and left it on his table. In his leisure when he had nothing else to do, he would read a page or so, and again it went into the rubbish. I took it out again, and placed it upon his table as before. My patience was as great as his reluctance to read these books. Finally, however, I prevailed; he went through the first volume! He stopped to scoff at Christianity! Something in the book must have touched his heart! I did the same thing with the second volume as with the first. Yes, he finished the second volume too, and he began to speak favorably of Christianity. Thank God, he was coming. He finished the third volume, and I observed some change in his life and manners. He would drink less wine, and his behaviors toward his wife and children were becoming more affectionate than before. The fourth volume was finished, and his heart came down! "Son," he said, ''I have been a proud man. From this day, you may be sure, I will be a disciple of Jesus." i took him to a church, and observed in him the convulsion of his w^hole nature. Everything he heard there moved him. The eyes that were all masculine and soldierly were now wet with tears. Jle would not touch his wine any more. Twelve months more, and he was baptized. He has studied the Scripture quite thoroughly, and though he never was a bad man, he has been a Christian man ever since. How thankful his son was, the reader may judge for himself. — Jericho fell, and the other cities of Canaan were captured in succession. My cousin, my uncle, my brothers, my mother, and my sister, all followed; and for ten years, though the hand of Providence hath dealt quite bitterly with us, and we have been made to pass through many a deep water; and though the faith we owned has made us repulsive in the eyes of the world, and much of the comforts of life were to be given up for His name's sake, I believe w^e are still second to no other family in the land in our love and loyality to our Heavenly Master. Four years ago, another member was added to our family. She came to us as a ^'heathen," but within a year, no woman was more faithful to her Lord and Savior than she. The good Lord removed her away from us after she remained with us only a year and a half; but her coming to us was her opportunity of finding the Savior of her soul; and in Him confiding she passed into His joy and bliss, after fighting right nobly for her Master and country. Blessed is she that sleepeth in the Lord, and blessed are we all whose bond is in Him and is spiritual.

In autumn I returned once more to my field of activity in the north. I took my younger brother with me, as my family was poor, and I had to unburden my parents, now that I became a salaried man. I entered into a copartnership with Edwin, Hugh, Charles, and Paul, and we together kept a house. It was a continuation of our college life, only with a little more of freedom and comfort in it than in our school dormitory.

Oct. IG, Sunday. — ^Mr. K. preaches in the morning. We meet for the first time in our new church in the South Street.

Mr. K. was a Presbyterian; not a college graduate, but a precious addition to our Christian community. He was a young man yet, but a man of deep spirituality and extensive Christian experiences.

During our absence in the metropolis, O. the '^Missionary Monk" was industrious in finding a house of worship for us. The place he hit upon w^as one half of one building, and was procured at the cost of two hundred and seventy dollars. Our portion was about 30 x 36 feet, two stories high, the roof shingled, and had a garden twice as extensive as the house itself. It was built as a tenement house, and a kitchen and fire-places occupied a very large part of it. We rented the two rooms in the upper story to help the general expense of the church. The basement floor was all fitted up for the church. Hugh ordered for us six strong benches, and they were reserved for the male part of the attendants. Ladies sat upon straw mats, right in front of the pulpit which consisted of an elevated platform and a table of the simplest construction. But it was a decided improvement upon the flour-barrel pulpit in our "incipient church." When there were more attendants than these seats could hold, a large fireplace which was a rectangular space cut into the floor, was covered with pine boards; and blankets spread upon them afforded seats for about ten more. The house was crowded to its utmost ca- pacity wlien fifty were present, and in wintertime when a stove occupied a large space in front of tlie pulpit so tliat a smoke-pipe hid the face of the preacher from the view of the male population of the congregation, every nook of the house was filled by a human species of some kind, sitting or reclining as it seemed most comfortable to him. We had an organ too by this time. It was given us by our friend. Rev. Mr. Den., — not the most perfect of its kind, but good enough for the congregation it was to lead in the holy music. The kind Providence provided a musician to play upon this instrument in the person of one Mr. F., who likewise was another valuable addition to the church. As the ceiling was not more than ten feet above the floor, the bellow of the organ swelled by the chorus of fifty or more untutored voices shook the building with discordant vibrations of the most dreadful kind. The peace of our neighbors who lived next door to our wall was thus much infringed upon, and their complaints which were not altogether unjust were constant. And woe was he, who boarded in the upper story! The Sunday being the best day in the week, the brethren resorted to the house of worship from very early in the morning; and not till the evening service was over at 10 p. m., and they all retired to their nests, was the house free from human voices of some kind. For the first time in our lives we had a house of our own, and we used it as no house was ever used. The eldest member of the church who had recently joined us, called it an 'inn," where we might drop in at any time in our life-journey to recuperate ourselves; and his dropping-ins w^ere as frequent as the moments of rest he needed in his busy life in an advanced age. It was a reading-room, a class-room, a committee- room, a refreshment-room, and a club-room at tlie same time. Laughters that almost burst our diaphrams, sobs of penitence that touched our innermost hearts, arguments that wearied the biggest and soundest of our heads, and talks about markets and money-making schemes, were all heard in this most convenient of houses. Such was our church, and we never have seen the like of it in the whole world.

The work for union and independence was pushed on quite vigorously. Our Episcopalian brethren and sisters would give up their house of worship and join with us, and they brought with them their books and organ. The Church Missionary Society of England that helped them to buy the house would use it for its own purpose, and its "converts" would unite with us Methodists to pay back our debts to the Methodist Episcopal Mission. Both parties were to leave their respective denominations as soon as the debts were paid over, and the two to constitute themselves into one independent native church. The plan was agreed upon, and we on our part felt no difficulty about it. Only our outside friends discussed much about the propriety and feasibility of the plan, and the grave difficulties that might lie in our future. But we were blind as to our future, and thanks to our "blessed ignorance,'' the union was effected without any of the difficulties anticipated by our over-solicitous friends.

The constitution of the new church was the simplest that can be imagined. Our creed w^as the Apostle's Creed, and the church discipline was based upon the "Covenant of the Believers in Jesus," drawn up by our New England professor five years ago. The church was managed by a committee of five, one of them tlie treasurer. All common business was transacted by them; but when matters came up that the Covenant did not touch upon, such as the admission and dismission of members, the whole church was called together, and the votes of the two-thirds of the whole membership was required to carry them into effect. The church required eve7y one of its fjieitibers to do so7nething for it. No one of them was to be idle, and if he could not do anything else, let him sawwood for our stove. Everybody was responsible for its growth and prosperity, and in this respect O. the ^'Missionary Monk" was no more responsible than our little "Miss Pine," the tiniest member of our church. Of course, not every one of us felt like preaching. So, O. the "Missionary Monk," W. the "Crocodile," John the "Episcopalian," and Jonathan occupied the pulpit in turn, and Mr. K. our Presbyterian friend helped us considerably in this line. Hugh was our faithful treasurer, and kept our accounts by the double-entry system of book-keeping. There was a special visiting committee, where our good Edwin appeared most conspicuously. The younger of our members formed a colporteur party, selling Bibles and tracts among the neighboring towns and villages. Many of us stayed mostly outside of the town, in exploring new lands, in surveying, in railroad construction, etc.; but they were all busy in Christian works as we at home. We will see further on how the whole machinery worked for the great aim we had in view.

Special works for young men became imperative, and a Y. M. C. A. was added to our works.

The idea we got while we were in the metropolis last summer.

Nov. 12. — The opening meeting of Y. M. C. A. The audience, about 60. Entertainment with tough rice after the meeting. A very prosperous gathering.

Our little church was filled to its utmost capacity. Tough rice is rice steamed with red beans, and is usually served up on occasions of congratulation. It ta'^stes good, but our dyspeptic friends better not touch it, for only tough stomachs can bear it. — I remember I was one of the speakers of the day. My subject was: '^The Relation of the Scallop-Shell to Christianity." The point was to reconcile Geology with the Book of Genesis; and the scallop-shell was especially chosen for this purpose, as our species FerUn yessoensis was the commonest mollusk on our coast, and its shells were abundantly found as fossils. Such w^ords and phrases as '^Evolution," ''the Struggle for Existence," and "the Survival of the Fittest" were being heard in our circles; and a blow was found necessary upon the atheistic evolutionists who were beg-inning to make some figures in our country about that time. My subject sounded odd, and the boys heard me well.

Nov. 15, Tuesday.— Meet with W. and O. at 3 P. M. and consult about the church. The whole congregation meets at 4, and discusses about the future of the church. — One hundred dollars (|100) in U. S. gold sent by Prof. Dr. C. is received.

A preliminary meeting of three members of the committee was followed by the general gathering of the whole congregation. Now that we set sail on the boisterous sea of the practical life, we found the human existence to be a more real and serious affair than we had imagined in our classrooms. Things did not move as we willed and planned. Not every one of us was in red-hot earnestness about the church, and some flaggings of interest were recognizable in certain quarters. We had already run into a debt of four hundred dollars, and the general expense of the church was not small, though we paid nothing to our preachers. How to meet all these difificulties was the question to be decided in the meeting. No good thoughts were coming. Only let us be prepared to unstring our purses, for we might be required to give all we had for the cause. We separated with sighs and anxieties.~0. the "Missionary Monk" returns to his nest, and behold, something is waiting for him. A cheque for one hundred dollars in U. S. gold sent for the church by the originator of the "Covenant of the Believers in Jesus," sent away from his home in New England! Jehovah-jireh, — the Lord will provide! Lift up your heads, ye brethren! We are not forsaken by the Father in Heaven. The good news spreads through the congregation, and hope revives within us.

Dec. 18, Sunday. — Severe snow-storm. I preached. Much distressed by the snow being driven into the church.

Our cheap wooden structure was not snowproof, and our ladies' quarter was not available for use on that day. The sledge that carried them stuck in the snow, and they had a hard time in reacliing their home. »We forget not such a meeting in such a weather.

Dec. 20, Thursday.— Busy through the whole afternoon. All things were ready before dusk. The meeting began at 6 P. M. Brethren and sisters to the number of 30 were present. The best meeting we have had in S. All spoke of their hearts, and enjoyed the evening freely till half-past 9 o'clock.

The usual Christmas festival was postponed till this day, when all the members of the church could be back in the town. This was essentially a Christian gathering; no more wrestling of Dharmas and dancing of a savage as in the Christmas of two years ago. The joy we felt this evening was truly spiritual. The year in whole was a successful one, and the works we had accomplished were not small. Sweet were the pleasures after toils!

Jan. 1, 1882, Sunday.— All meet in the church in afternoon and express their feelings. Letters from Messrs. D. and H. Much distressed.

The fact was, while we were saying Happy- New-Year's to one another, rejoicing in God's blessings for the year that had just gone by, two letters were received by us, one from Rev. Mr. H. our beloved missionary friend, and the other from Rev. Mr. D. The latter was a short, incisive letter, stating briefly that he could not very well give his consent to our plan of forming an independent church, and asking us to pay back to him by tele- gram any part of tlie money whicli his church had forwarded to us to build a house of worship. His letter was construed as his avowed dissent from our procedure, which was enforced by a requirement to square our accounts with his church if we would separate ourselves from his denomination. And such a construction of his letter was not wholly unreasonable, for our financial state must have been well known to him, and his words w^ere too few to carry any sentiments of real sympathy in our motive. If the Methodist Episcopal Mission lent us money that we might start its denominational church in our place, w^e should never have asked its aid. Our independence w^as not intended as a revolt against Methodism, but as an expression of our real attachment to our heavenly Master, and of the highest sentiment of our love to our nation. We borrowed the money, though the mission said it would be given us. We were all young then, and our animal spirit was high too. "Let's pay it at once. Prof. C.'s money is still untouched, and let the church chest be emptied to the last cent to clear our debt!" said one. "Agreed! Pay on!" all rejoined. Jonathan was charged to consult with Hugh the treasurer, and to send to Mr. D. by a telegraphic money order all the available sum of money in the church treasury. I believe nothing knitted the two Christian bodies of the place more firmly than this very unwelcome letter on the first day of January.

Jan. 6.— Send |200 to Rev. Mr. D. by telegraphic money order.

We tried to comply with Mr. D.'s requirement at once by paying him all our debt to his denomi- nation. But this we could not do with all our possible means. We had been taxing our brethren pretty heavily, and we could not exact any more from them."^ Prof. C.'s money formed the main bulk of the present installment. We were not very happy in letting go the money so soon after it reached us.

Jan. 7.— Busy in arranging for the Dedication Service of to-morrow.

j^n. 8. — The Dedication Service of the S. Church begins at 2 P. M.

The attendance about 50. To-day w^e dedicate this church to God. May His glory shine forth in this district from this place.

The common burden v/e had to bear knitted our hearts together, and we might now enter into a formal union, and publicly dedicate to God the church of our own. The little wooden building shook with the hallelujahs of fifty united voices, —woe to our poor neighbors! Our organ, whose two kevs were out of tune, bellowed forth the loudest' anthems at the touch of Mr. F.'s fingers. Unto the name of the Most High God we dedicate this humble dwelling, the best and utmost of all we can offer! Let this be the veritable Shekinah, and His presence be as real in it as in the gorgeous temple of the wise son of David. He liketh a broken and contrite heart under whatever garbs it dwells; and the church that He liketh best has no need of pipe-organs, stained glass windows, and baptismal fonts. A clear January sun shined upon plain unvarnished benches through two windows partlv covered by curtains of the coarsest texture, as*^ our good O. passed his benediction upon the humble crowd that bowed in gratitude. We could almost hear in the dry bracing wintry air the voice of Him who said, ''Of a truth I say unto you, that this poor widow hath cast in more than they all." Luke XXI, 2.

Feb. 16, Thursday.— Meet with O. W., and John to frame rules for the S. Church. Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday are fixed as the days for meeting.

Now that we dedicated our house of worship, some written forms of the church regulations became imperative. Four of the members of the Executive Committee were empowered to prepare drafts of such rules. We were to consider what should rule this most unique of Christian churches, — to preserve all that were essential in Christianity, and to adajjt them to our new surroundings. For seven days the discussions continued, which resulted in a rough frame-work of the church organizations. The meeting was opened with prayers and closed with prayers. We were awfully earnest, and disposed of articles after articles as we surrounded a little fire-place and heard a tea-kettle singing for us a resonant music with its steam-jets. Jonathan's dashing thoughts were tempered by O.'s cool judgement; and John's opportune ideas were corrected by W.'s legality to adjust them to the time. The whole now needed the consent of the church council to become effective.

March 6. — Removed to the church-building.

They offered me a room in the upper story of the church, but not for nothing. I was charged to sweep tlie meeting-place, to look after the cliureh-library, and to take up all the duties of a janitor and a*^ sexton; and to pay to the treasury two dollars a month as my room-rent. I have not seen such a convenient church-officer anywhere else. From this day, my room became a regular resorting place of the brethren.

March 13. — Made a mutual pledge to clear the church debt by the October of this year.

Our debt-paying must not be indefinitely dela^^ed. Let every body make up his mind to pay his portion within the specified time. Suppose you give up your European restaurant for ten months; that will help you to pay half your portion. Suppose you go with your old jacket and pants until the next year; that will enable you to fill up your share of the common burden. The net income of each of us was twenty-five dollars a month, and we were to pay a whole month's salary by the October next.

gept. 2— Set out to the A-mill with Brother Ts. I preached in the evening.

Sept. 3. — Left the A-mill in morning. Stopped at Mr. H.'s and preached. The outlook in the Mill is hopefuL

The opening of a preaching station in the A — mill is one of the most memorable episodes in our church history, and one that illustrates the methods of our united Christian work better than any other work we had accomplished. The mill was about fifteen miles from our place, up in a mountain district, where the Government had recentlv introduced an American turbine wheel to reduce huge pine forests to sMngles and timbers. A carriage road was to be constructed from our place to the new mill, and surveyors were sent out to reconnoitre for the new highway. It so happened that our U. the ''Good-Natured" was the chief-surveyor in this expedition, and while he was engaged in his work, he did what he could to introduce the Bible and Christianity to the little colony that was formed around the mill. As soon as the route was determined upon, the final survey was entrusted to Hugh, our churchtreasurer, who during his stay in the mountain succeeded in bringing one very precious soul to Christ, O. nicknamed the ^'Apodal." Now that the road was surve^^ed, the man who was appointed to construct it was Mr. H., another member of our church. He too labored for Christ among his colleagues, and his words in the dead silence of the primeval forest were not without effects. Before the road was fairly finished another worthy soul was won for the Master. Meanwhile the seed which U. the "Good-Natured" had sown in the mill was sprouting and making good growth. The people there were impatient for the opening of the new road, and they sent us words to come and preach the Gospel to them. So I was sent with Brother T. on this errand, and we were the fir^t that trod the road which was reconnoitred by a Christian, surveyed by a Christian, and built by a Christian. Before a single piece of timber was carried over this road, the feet of those that carried the glad tidings of Peace were upon it. It was essentially a "Christian" road, and "the Way" we called it. "Every valley shall be exalted, and every mountain and hill shall be made low," that the King of Glory may come in.

Sept. 23, Saturday. — A national holiday. Not a speck of cloud in the sky. At 1 P. M, all gathered at the church, and together proceeded to the museum ground. There were poem-makings, tea-parties, and ring-throwing. All enjoyed the day completely.

This was a "field day" for our church-members, which we repeated usually twice a year, — in spring and in autumn. While we were yet "heathens," we had such /eU champetre, with poisonous drinks to cause unnatural exhilarations, and "devil-ings," as plays were called where one of us nominated a "devil" was to catch any one who strayed out of the "heaven," and he who was thus caught was to be a devil himself. But the new religion had ameliorated our tempers, and though we enjoyed open air and innocent plays as much as ever before, we substituted poemmakings and tea-drinkings to "devil-ings" and alcohol-drinkings; and the pleasures we derived from such a change we found to be far superior to what our unconverted friends were still indulging in. I have already told my readers how we knitted our hearts together in winter-time around one common iron kettle. Either when "snowbound," or on the "museum ground," we counted much upon these social gatherings for the effectiveness of our united church-work.

Between this and the end of the year, nothing worth mentioning came in our experiences. I was busy both in religious and secular works. The condition of the church was fairly settled by this time. As we had pledged early this year, the money to be paid back to the M. E. Mission was gradually coming in. Not everybody paid his portion very willingly, but pay lie did nevertheless. Near the close of the year, John and I were in the metropolis, and we were entrusted with the money to square our accounts with the mission.

Dec. 28. — Drew money from the Bank, and paid it to Kev. Mr. S.

S Church is Independent, Joys inexpressable and indescribable!

The result of two years' economy and industry was our freedom from the church-debt, and well we might leap with joy and thanksgiving. Here is our Magna Charta:

Rec'd of Mr. Jonathan X., the sum of One Hundred and Eighty One Dollars and Thirty One Sen, being the Balance due the M. E. Mission, on account of a Loan (|698.40) to the S. Christians, to assist them in building a church, in the year 1881. J. S."

We were thankful that we now owed no man anything, except in our sense of gratitude for the help extended toward us, enabling us to use the money without interest for two years.

They do err who think that our church-independence was intended as an open rebellion against the denomination to which we once belonged. It was an humble attempt to reach the one great aim we had in view; namely, to come to the full consciousness of our own powers and capabilities (God-given), and to remove obstacles in the way of others seeking God's Truth for the salvation of their souls. He only knows how much he really can do who knows how to relj upon himself. A dependent man is the most helpless being in this universe. Many a church complains of its lack of means whose members could afford to spend much upon unnecessary luxuries. Many a church can stand upon its own feet if but its members could forego some of their ^^hobbies." I7idependence is the conscious realization of one^s own capabilities; and I believe this to be the beginning of the realization of many other possibilities in the field of human activity. This is the kindliest and most philosophic way of looking at independence of any kind. To stigmatize it as a rebellion, or as an instigation of the unthinking mass by a few ambitious men, is not generous, especially in a Christian, whose peculiarity should be that he '^thinketh no evil."

Dec. 29. — The members of the S. Church who were present in the metropolis assemble at Francis' at 1 P. M. Together we went to the "Plum Restaurant" in the Morning Grass Park, and supped together, and celebrated the Independence of our Church.

This was our first ''Fourth of July." I think there were with us Francis, W. tlie ''Crocodile," and T. the "Pterodactyl." The last in his usual savage style swallowed the contents of the first cup of soup that was brought to him; and afterward asked the w^aitress what was in the soup. Upon being answered that there were some tiny clam-shells in it, he confessed that he was so glad of church-independence that he sent everything that was in the cup through his oesophagus without the process of mastication taking place upon it in his ante-pliaryngeal cliamber. I think the real explanation of it was he was really very hungry.

With the independence of my church, I took my farewell of it. The church needs a separate history for itself, to describe it in all its bearings upon the great question of the evangelization of nations. Four years ago, I paid a visit to my old home-church, and to my most grateful satisfaction, I found it in a very much more prosperous state than when I left it thirteen years ago. I found O. the "Missionary Monk" the same faithful pastor, receiving 7iot a cent for his wholesouled devotio7i to his churchy earning a livelihood by teaching in the college where I graduated. The members numbered some 250. They engaged two salaried evangelists, had a prosperous Y. M. C. A., originated and sustained a strong temperance union. During 1885, the year that witnessed the greatest activity among the Christians of all denominations in our land, the amount of contribution per capita of some of the more influential churches were as follows:

The comparison speaks too well for our own church. They built a new church costing some one thousand dollars, and though it looked somewhat like a ''nigger church" which I saw in Virginia, it was a decided improvement upon that "one-half of one building" whose janitor and sexton I once was. A new organ they had too, with keys all in order. They were speaking of erecting a new stone-church before long. It is really the only church in the whole country, which is independent in the full significance of that term. Not only financially, but ecclesiastically and theologically, they were carrying on their Christian works upon their own responsibilities, with the happiest results. They have a system and principles peculiar to their own, and we believe the Lord wants them to retain those peculiarities as sacred. They have a special mission to fulfill, let no one disturb them in their simplicity and contentment.